The Pause

I’m pausing…officially.

Pausing, or “to pause” as defined in the english dictionary is: 1) to stop doing something briefly before continuing 2) a brief moment of hesitation or uncertainty before something happens or is done…this is EXACTLY what I am doing. I’m pushing the pause button on everything in my life: my career, my household duties, my adult obligations (whatever the heck those are), my time with my husband and doggy, my paper designs, my hair and beauty maintenance (okay, so I’m still gonna shave my legs…maybe), my constant feelings of guilt around not working out enough, or eating well enough, or being available enough to those I love, and my constant and overwhelming thoughts of “what’s next?” Yep, that’s right…it’s all on pause.

I left yesterday morning (okay, so I think it was yesterday – boy does jet lag really make for a fuzzy brain) with my 38 lb pack, and “heavier than it looks” teeny backpack strapped to my body, for a 2+ month trek around Europe. Flying from Seattle to New York, New York to London, then taking a train from London to Bath, followed by a taxi ride to the most adorable B&B I have EVER laid my eyes on, I arrived at my first stop. The pause is official. I’m in Europe with only one intent: to pause.

This pause is incredibly intentional for a few reasons: 1) for those of you who know me I struggle with letting the little things in,  instead always looking towards what is coming next – I wanna take a moment to smell ALL of the roses 2) the anxiety, fear, apprehension, sadness, and numbness I feel around the loss of my job is something I wanna work through and move past as quickly as possible 3) an extended stay in Europe is a total dream of mine, and gosh dangit I’m doing it! 4) I want to believe that reflection, and the simple act of breathing lends to a more open heart and mind for future endeavors.

So, to make a long story short, my traditional blog postings are taking a momentary hiatus. Instead I will post about things I experience along the way. Sights, sounds, smells, paper bits, exciting findings, my personal discoveries, hopefully wedding stuff, and god knows what else. I’ll do my best to include pictures and such, with the only real intent to capture this moment in my life…this sweet and blissful pause.

The adorable treasure box of teas, hot chocolate, and coffee mixings near my bedside at the B&B. The perfect assortment of warm drinks that encourage all of us to take that breath in and say “ahhhh….”

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11 Comments

Filed under Travel

11 responses to “The Pause

  1. lars

    How is Bath Spa? Take the time to “pause” for a traditional English tea while in Bath. Its WAY more expensive in London. Do it now, without Adam, because he is not “made” for such delicate things. They don’t serve Diet Dew for afternoon tea…..but they do serve cookies.

    • Hey Lars,
      Bath is amazing! I will definitely take your advice and try to go for afternoon tea tomorrow. I’m gonna do my best to get to the Thermae Bath Spa as well, to soak up the Roman bath experience, and maybe get a massage…jealous??
      P.S. You are totally right, there is no Diet Dew in sight…

  2. Adam

    You continue to amaze me every day… I love you so much and I am so happy to have such a strong woman as my wife!! Enjoy everything (but not too much… I do want you to come back to me eventually)!!

  3. Kate

    Jenn,

    I am so excited for your adventure!! I love #4 best–reflection and the simple act of breathing leads to a more open heart and mind for future endeavors. Something we should all do more often!!
    I am so excited for you and can’t wait to see what this trip has in store for you!
    See you in a couple of weeks!
    Kate
    ps nice picture!!

  4. I am so happy for and proud of you for doing this. You rock for being brave and following your heart. I can´t wait to read more- just don’t let your blog be the thing that draws you away from the moment. I find myself doing that sometimes. Thinking, “I can’t wait to post about this!” Love you Jenn!

    • Thanks Cor! And thanks for the reminder to stay in the moment : ) I hope you are having a blast on your own adventure. I keep reading all your updates and am loving them! Take care of yourself!

  5. caryn

    i love ya jenn. i am so excited for you and super jealous. you are so awesome and i love the posts. can’t wait to hear about everything along the way. i am so proud of you and for your courage to take this adventure. love ya sis

    • Caryn! I’m so sorry we didn’t get a chance to talk right before I left…the planning got a bit nuts! I miss you tons and can’t wait to plan a time to come see you when I get home. Love you!

  6. Barb

    Jenn!

    Thank you for sharing your trip with us! Will give at least me a chance “to pause” whenever I sit and read of your amazing adventures. . .could actually smell the bacon cooking and the lavendar/eucalyptus steam rooms. So easy to join in your enthusiasm and excitement. . .can’t wait for the next episode in our “Pause Adventure!” Love you!

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